Difficult conversations

Handling difficult conversations at work – Six handy tips

We all have times when it may be necessary to have difficult conversations at work, and whatever the scenario the tricky part is how to manage the exchange so it goes as smoothly as possible.

Recent research has shown the key to difficult conversations is to learn how to handle them so they produce a better outcome.

Guidelines include:

  1. Always face up to difficult conversations and don’t avoid them
  2. Take regular breaks at work during the day, as the more calm and centred you are when handling tough conversations the better you will conduct them
  3. Slow down the pace of the conversation when you have it, as this will give you more time to find the right words, and also signal to your counterpart that you are really listening to them
  4. Frame the discussion in a positive or neutral light rather than as a ‘difficult conversation’ in your mind. This will help defuse it and make it easier to address
  5. Be open and flexible when discussing the problem, i.e. don’t write a script for how you want things to go, as it rarely goes the way you plan
  6. Don’t ignore the other person’s point of view: just ask them how they see the problem and look for positive overlaps between your respective viewpoints.

Empathy is also very important, as by showing the person you care and are considerate to their needs, you will gain their trust.

Finally, always ask yourself, ‘What can I give back?’

For example, if you are forced to lay someone off who has worked for the company for a long time, you could offer to write them a recommendation or testimonial.

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How to handle difficult conversations at work

By Mike Peeters